Super Mario 64 is scary...

Hello everyone, Reese here. Todaaaaay I am going to show you the scariest things in the game known as Super Mario 64 which was released June 23, 1996.

In no particular order here we go:

The Basement -

The basement always scared me as a kid. I just hated going down there. When I walk down there it just seems like an insane killer is going to jump out from nowhere. Just look at the walls, they seem to have some green goo on them, and other stuff I cannot explain.

The Eel -

What can i say about the eel? i mean just look at it, do I even NEED to explain.

The Book -

This book is probably worse than the book from The Evil Dead. This book literally flies around and it has TEETH. WTF! Does it also see the dentist. Eating bones can't be easy on the teeth. Thankfully this book is also stupid and flies into the other shelf killing itself instantly. Phew. Crisis avoided.

The Hallway Ghost - 

This ghost just floats there, almost mocking you. And daring you to follow it. Where? Why? Who is this ghost? I cannot say. Why does Princess Peach have a ghost in her hallway, did she kill this poor ghost? Maybe Peach is the killer who is going to jump out and kill me when I'm in the basement. Questions, but no answers.

The Goo -

The gateway to Nessie. Who is even more terrifying than anything else on the game. Which makes this the second most scary thing in the game. I also refer to this as the gateway to Satan.

The Merry Go Round -

OH GEE ! I LOVE MERRY GO ROUNDS HEE HEE HAA HO HEE. OMFG WTF IS THAT?  And then I went insane. Also Mario looks like such a bad-ass in this picture. Fuck you ghost of someone Peach murdered. I'm rescuing her whether you like it or not. Side note: This music haunts my dreams.

The Never Ending Stairs -

I really don't know why the never ending stairs scare me so. I think maybe it's of the freaky music that just keeps on going and no matter how long you try it will ALWAYS keep going. Even if you were to tape the toggle up and leave it like that for the rest of your life, you would NEVER make it without 70 stars. Also Bowser and Peach's portraits are scary too. Always watching. Watching Always.

The Piano -

Who wasn't scared of this piano. You walk by all casually going about your normal Mario business when BOOM! It opens it's HUGE red, jagged teeth lined mouth and immediately starts chomping after you all terrifying like. The strangest thing is that you leave the room, and then come back in, it's "normal". Like we're going to forget what it attempted to do. But not me. I'm on to your tricks. 

Nessie -

I am still to this day scared of this.. dinosaur thing. Look at his lifeless eyes and his freakish grin. Why are you smiling? Do you enjoy me stepping on you ? Why do you swim in circles? Why are you here? I think Peach has some skeletons in her closet. Or inside your belly. Probably both. And the sounds you make. Horrible, horrible nightmare inducing stuff right there. I avoid this stage at all costs. I don't go in there until I absolutely have to. But you know what the worst part is? This freak is in Mario Party 3. I can never escape. Never escape Never. Escape. Never.

In conclusion, Peach is the scariest thing about this game. With her scary murder style basement, dungeons, and (probably) human eating dragon, she deserves the top spot. Nevermind Nessie or the Gateway to Hell.

Do you agree that these are the scariest things on Super Mario 64? If not sound off in the comments below.

 - Reese